What constitutes a “normal frequency” of sexual activity within a committed relationship? I’ve engaged in discussions with married couples over recent weeks, exploring their sexual behaviors, and the revelations were truly surprising.
It’s essential to clarify that these couples I’ve conversed with are acquaintances of mine, both online and offline. Admittedly, the sample size is limited, comprising only 40 distinct couples. Consequently, it may not be prudent to draw all-encompassing conclusions from these insights, but they do offer some valuable observations on marriages in 2022.
Furthermore, it’s noteworthy that each couple we interviewed has children. This aspect holds significance since the presence of children often influences the timing and opportunities for sex between parents. Although I won’t delve into the specifics of their ages, please understand that all the couples I spoke with have at least one child below the age of 18 residing with them.
This whole exploration originated from a casual conversation within a small circle of friends about our respective levels of sex. Subsequently, my curiosity was piqued to the extent that I conducted interviews with several additional friends at different intervals, encompassing both males and females. Notably, in four of the couples, I had the chance to speak with both the husband and wife, leading to intriguing insights.
Without further ado, let us now delve into the knowledge gained from these discussions.
Frequency of Sex:
Among the interviewed couples, a majority reported engaging in sexual activity at least once a week but generally not exceeding three times weekly, making it the prevalent response. One particular couple, in an admirable disclosure, shared that they aim for daily intimacy, resulting in 5 to 7 encounters per week, and occasionally even more if they engage multiple times a day, which happens on occasion. It is noteworthy to mention that this information was initially conveyed by the husband, and to my pleasant surprise, his wife independently confirmed the same account without any prior knowledge of our conversation. Their commitment to each other is truly remarkable, which makes me admire their relationship and consider spending more time in their company. However, that is a tangent from the main topic.
Conversely, the remaining two couples reported significantly lower frequencies of sexual activity. One individual humorously remarked that he could count the number of times they had been intimate in the past year on his fingers. The other couple, while not as extreme, acknowledged having extended periods without sexual activity, stretching into months.
To summarize this limited sample size of real couples, the most prevalent response was having sex 1-3 times per week.
Factors Influencing Sexual Frequency Among Couples: A Discussion
Various aspects come into play when considering the frequency of sexual activity among couples. Two primary factors were commonly cited as influential, with a third closely related. Notably, the presence of children emerged as a significant consideration impacting sexual frequency. Interestingly, irrespective of the child’s age, seven couples disclosed that their ability to engage in regular sexual activity was influenced by their children.
The other prevalent factor hindering sexual activity was stress and fatigue. Although I can relate to this challenge, I also understand the importance of persevering despite these obstacles. It becomes somewhat of a catch-22 situation, and finding a balance can be demanding.
During this research, I must admit a personal bias that surfaced. When confronted with the notion that exhaustion and stress hindered sexual activities, I initially assumed it primarily affected women while men remained eager and ready for sexual adventures.
However, upon further investigation, I discovered that this was not entirely the case. The responsibility for initiating or avoiding sexual activity was more evenly distributed among the couples. Clearly, there are numerous reasons why individuals may feel inclined or disinclined toward sex.
Although not a formal scientific study, I approached the matter with sensitivity and respect for the couples’ privacy. While I could have delved deeper into more sexual details, I chose to honor their preferences, sharing only what they felt comfortable disclosing.
Who takes the lead in initiating intimate relations?
Initially, I presumed that men predominantly initiated such sexual encounters within their relationships, but intriguingly, this assumption was disproven. To my surprise, in the couples I interviewed, it was the woman who more frequently engaged in initiating sexual activity than her male partner. This phenomenon perplexes me, and I wonder if we are witnessing a significant shift unfolding before us.
Contented?
This is the sole inquiry I posed, receiving unanimous agreement from all individuals in the small space chosen whom I conversed with. Each and every person expressed a desire for a more fulfilling sexual life.
What does this signify? It implies that all of us could benefit from experiencing more intimacy. In the following weeks, I intend to compose articles exploring various ways couples can allocate time and muster the energy to enhance their intimacy. My aspiration is that these pieces will assist some individuals out there, and we shall observe the outcomes.
Before I conclude, I wish to inquire if you are open to sharing… How fulfilled do you feel in your sexual relationship? Are your current experiences satisfactory? What factors contribute to this situation? Please share your thoughts in the comments!
Be Safe and Sexy and Do a lot of Sex.